A running joke on MASH that causes lasting confusion is when the characters refer to being sent to Korea as “the American plan.” This joke seems to make no sense because, of course, it was America who sent American soldiers and doctors to Korea, thus it was America’s plan in its war efforts. So, what’s the gag? How is this funny? The joke is quite simple, but also multi-layered. Let’s explore the meaning of the phrase American Plan on MASH.
The American Plan is mentioned as a joke several times on MASH, including:
- Season 4, Episode 1, Welcome to Korea: Hawkeye uses the joke when first meeting B.J. Hunnicutt
- Season 6, Episode 17: Tea and Empathy: Hawkeye uses the joke when talking with a British Major.
- Season 8, Episode 17: Heal Thyself: A visiting replacement surgeon, Captain Newsom, uses the joke.
Welcome To Korea, Part 1: American Plan Joke 1
In Season 4, Episode 1, titled Welcome to Korea, Hawkeye returns from leave to find that Trapper has received his orders to go home and has already left. Hawkeye and Radar take a jeep and race to Kimpo Air Base, where Hawkeye hopes to find Trapper before he catches his plane. They arrive too late but find Trapper’s replacement, Captain B.J. Hunnicutt.
Hawkeye expresses his anger and frustration at having missed Trapper by only a few minutes, and then suggests they all go home. However, the jeep they arrived in has been stolen. Hawkeye decides they should go into the Officers’ Club to have a drink. He puts B.J.’s captain’s bars on Radar’s cap and mockingly promotes him to “Corporal Captain.” Radar is very nervous and gets stares from the actual officers in the club, and draws the disapproval of a Colonel. After Hawkey tells the officer they are conducting a survey to see how others feel about the new experimental rank of Corporal Captain, the Colonel declares that he doesn’t like it at all!
While having their drinks, Hawkeye talks with B.J., who is understandably shocked at the chaos and conditions. When a plane passes by overhead, very low, Hawkeye asks B.J., “Feel like you just stepped into a time machine?” B.J. replies:
“Two months ago, I’m in residency in Sausalito, a little house in Mill Valley; Peggy’s eight months pregnant. And they draft me. Five weeks training at Fort Sam Houston. A bunch of doctors stumbling around, totally lost. Some idiot shooting live ammo over your head…”
Hawkeye nods, replying, “American plan.”
Note that B.J.’s description of having 5 weeks of training and even experiencing live ammo is almost certainly historically incorrect. Many doctors received no training at all, and others had perhaps six days of completely ineffective and pointless training before being shipped to Korea. So, the American plan was no plan at all. That’s part of the joke, but not the entire joke.
Tea and Empathy – American Plan Joke 2
In Season 6 Episode 17, titled Tea and Empathy, a British Major comes into the post-op to visit his wounded troops. The Major tells his men they are looking chipper and that “we’ll have you chaps back on duty in no time.”
He dismisses the idea that one of his soldiers needs a couple of weeks of recovery, saying, “Nonsense! There are plenty of lads up on the line that are worse off than you. What do you think this is, a Holiday at Brighton?“
Hawkeye overhears and is angry about the Major being completely unconcerned and cavalier about his men’s injuries. He walks over and says, in a mock British accent, “Alf a mo, guv. Who are you?“
The major answers, “Major Derek Ross, Gloucester Regiment. You wouldn’t be the chap that told this man he could lollygag around here for a fortnight?“
“Yeah, plenty of rest and 100 c.c.’s of lollygag,” says Hawkeye.
“I don’t appreciate your humor, doctor. What is your rank?“
“Either private or general. I can never keep that stuff straight.“
“Whatever you are, you obviously plan to keep these men here much longer than necessary. They all look ready to go right now.“
“Take another look, Major. These men need time to recuperate,” interjects B.J., who had walked over while the major was speaking.
“Nonsense, look at Michaels here—roses on his cheeks!“
“Take him out of here too soon and he’ll have lilies on his chest,” answers B.J.
“Is this mollycoddling standard procedure? These men aren’t on holiday, you know. They’re fighting a war, and they can’t do it on their backs.“
At this point, Winchester joins in, clearly thinking he is better qualified to deal with the British: “Ah, gentlemen, perhaps it would be best if you let me handle this. Uh, Major, the fact is that in our best medical opinion, it would simply be unwise to release these men prematurely. You ever had the Beef Wellington at the Dorchester?“
The Major, confused at this non-sequitur, answers, “Now see here, gentlemen, I’m their commanding officer and I will not have these men lounging about in this luxury resort.“
Hawkeye replies, “But, Major, they’re here on the American plan. Won’t cost you a farthing.”
This use of the joke clarifies the reference in the phrase ‘American Plan’ more clearly.
Heal Thyself – American Plan Joke 3
In Season 6, Episode 18, titled Heal Thyself, the medical staff is exposed to the mumps while visiting an orphanage that Father Mulcahy helps support. Some of the nurses are already quarantined with the illness, and then Col. Potter also gets the mumps, since he never had it as a child. Winchester mocks the Colonel for getting a “childhood malady.” Winchester, though, never had it himself, and his “superior breeding” does not protect him from it. He ends up being quarantined with Colonel Potter in the Colonel’s tent.
A replacement Surgeon, Captain Steven J. Newsom, played by Edward Herrmann, arrives. It turns out that Newsom is not a novice to combat surgery. He had been a surgeon at the Pusan perimeter, the bloodiest battle of the Korean War, where American, South Korean (ROK), and United Nations forces formed a perimeter around the city of Pusan to stop the North Koreans’ bloody advance into South Korea.
The Pusan Perimeter was a turning point in the war, after which a counteroffensive was struck at Inchon, followed by other decisive victories, leading to a more stable period of the war. Although the timeline is not always consistent or accurate, the MASH series takes place during this later, more stable period, during which the MASH units themselves were much less primitive and austere. However, the battle of the Pusan Perimeter was a horrific fight, and there were innumerable casualties on both sides, meaning that Captain Newsom is, in some ways, even more experienced than the doctors at the 4077th.
Captain Newsom bunks in the swamp, where Hawkeye and B.J. find out that he is not only qualified but is also quick-witted. We get a glimpse of his sense of humor when he walks into the Company Clerk’s office, where a surgical mask-wearing Klinger is frantically spraying disinfectant into the air to try to kill the mumps germs. He is terrified of contracting the disease because he is fearful it will render him sterile. Newsome quips:
“Keep firing, soldier. The commies are everywhere.“
“I’m disinfecting the place. We got mumps here, and I gotta be careful. If you get ’em as a kid, you don’t get ’em as an adult. But, if you get ’em as an adult, you don’t get kids. [resumes spraying] Take that, you little home-wreckers!“
“Good work, Corporal. Don’t take any prisoners! In the meantime, would you tell me where my billet is? I’d like to take my stuff away.“
Klinger takes Newsome to the Swamp, where Hawkeye and B.J. are playing volleyball with an inflated surgical glove. “Here we are, sir, our finest accommodations. Complete with cellmates. Gentlemen, I give you Dr. Newsom,” announces Klinger.
“Hi, he’s B.J., I’m Hawkeye,” says Captain Pierce.
“Well, that’s catchy. My name’s just plain Steve,” replies Newsom.
“Just Plain, I can’t tell you how glad we are to see you,” says B.J.
After Klinger leaves, the doctors offer Newsom a drink. He takes a swallow and reacts to the potent liquor. “Now I know what the Corporal is spraying the office with. This is quite a lovely spot you have here.“
“Oh, it’s not much, but we just call it hell,” answers Hawkeye.
“Yeah, we just came for a weekend. Now we may never leave,” says B.J.
“You’re probably here on the American plan,” says Newsom.
Hawkey replies, “Now, see here, Newsom, that remark shows a complete lack of respect for this man’s Army and all that it stands for. And I resent the fact that you beat me to it.“
The Joke Explained
The “American Plan” joke on MASH refers to the hotel industry, where the American Plan (AP) designates the meal plan that guests will receive while staying at the hotel. Besides the American Plan, there are two other common meal plans, the European Plan and the Continental Plan:
- European plan (EP): the hotel rate is only for lodging and includes no meals.
- Continental Plan (CP): the hotel rate includes a continental breakfast, which usually consists of coffee, tea, juice, bread, and sometimes fresh fruit, yogurt, and other foods. Breads may consist of different pastries like croissants, scones, or muffins. Some hotels offer waffles, since they can be quickly made in a waffle iron. Eggs, pancakes, and cooked foods are not usually considered a Continental breakfast.
- American Plan (AP): the hotel rate includes three meals a day, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, provided by the hotel kitchen. In Europe, this is called “full board.”
While there are, of course, other arrangements, these are the three commonly referenced plans. The American plan is often favored in remote locations where guests cannot expect to find many restaurants or perhaps where there are no food options at all. 1“Continental, European and American Plan.” The Most Famous Hotels in the World, famoushotels.org/news/continental-european-and-american-plan. Accessed 9 Aug. 2025. This means that people who are forced to travel, as on business, will often find themselves on the American plan. This begins to explain the joke used on MASH.
In the first use of the joke described above, B.J. Hunnicutt has been forced to travel to Korea, an undesirable location. During the conversation in the Officer’s Club, Hawkeye begins to set up the joke by describing the amenities and activities the MASH unit, and Korea have to offer: “You’re going to love it over here. Camping out, betting on rat races. Hot and cold running dysentery.”
Hawkeye is pretending as if the MASH 4077th is a hotel and the travel agent is the Army, or, by extension, the American government. Yes, a guest can expect to get three meals a day, but nothing else about the experience is to be recommended. If the MASH is a hotel, it’s a very bad one! The joke is a double one. The American plan references the hotel plan that travelers can find in some hotels, while also referencing the lack of planning the American military had before entering the Korean conflict. The American plan was, essentially, three meals a day and not much else.
While I may be stretching the joke beyond what the writers intended, doctors being sent to Korea found themselves in rudimentary camps with no experienced military personnel present. It would be like showing up at a hotel where the hotel is run by the guests, only the hotel is in a combat zone and consists of tents and a nonstop parade of wounded soldiers. These soldiers must be treated by doctors who are fresh out of residency or even internship and who may have never even performed surgery.
The second use of the joke, in Tea and Empathy, is more straightforward. Major Ross refers to the MASH as a “luxury resort” where his men are lounging around. By the standards of those in combat, the relatively peaceful and safe conditions of a MASH unit, albeit close to the front, would seem a welcome respite. By telling the Major his men are there on the American plan, Hawkeye is reacting to this characterization of MASH 4077th as a luxury resort and saying this was an “all expenses paid vacation” for the British soldiers, where the American military would foot the bill.
When Captain Newsome uses the joke in Heal Thyself, it has likewise been set up by Hawkeye and B.J., especially when B.J. says, “We just came for the weekend. Now we may never leave.” I don’t think I need to explain to you, at this point, why Newsom would say, “You’re probably here on the American plan.” If you were in a remote and hellish spot without “full board,” you surely wouldn’t stay past the weekend.
I make videos too! Watch the video about the most confusing MASH joke ever, The American plan, below.
